Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Healthier Inner Dialogue - Prioritization

You're not going to like this, but I'm going to say it anyway, because you need to hear it.  You cannot do it all.

I know, I know. You want to. You think you can. It isn't true. You just can't. You have to decide what is most important, make those things a priority, and let the rest go.

So how do you do that?

Well, I think that going back to the posts on perfectionism, saying no, and procrastination are helpful. You can switch your focus to 'good enough', doing your own stuff, and actually getting things done.  Then what?

How about finding encouragement from other fabulous people who are having good results in this area?  One of my favourite inspirational gals is Leonie Dawson.  She is an unconventional, successful, prioritizing goddess.  This is a recent facebook post of hers that really resonated with me:

"Decide what your true priorities are... And let go of the fact that you'll have it all together. For me, I always prioritise art, my family and my work over having a clean house all the time. During this illness, I've had to let go of so many things on my to do list and know the only things I can do right now is grow this baby and manage my beautiful business. Choose the things that are most important to you and do them. Let go of the rest. xoxo"

Dan Millman, of Way of the Peaceful Warrior fame, is another true motivator. He offers this advice:

David Allen is a business time management guru.  Here's what he says:

There is a gal in our family who spends a lot of time doing amazing things with her family, working, and having a full list of hobbies as well.  There is this other thing though,...her house isn't really very tidy. There are piles of things everywhere, the kind that would drive me crazy.

And you know what? The world hasn't ended.  She is experiencing a full life that doesn't always include tidying up the living room before people come over. It's okay with her.

I think that a big part of giving ourselves a break is to give other people a break.  Maybe if we work hard not to judge our girlfriend who never dusts but is always out doing cool things with the kids, then we will give ourselves permission to do the same.  We all know that dust is going to be back in a day or two anyway, so why stress about it?

I have a hard time with this but I am really working on it. Do you find it hard to leave chores or obligations to do something that is more meaningful to you and your family?


Kei said...

Great post, Terry! I have a friend with a constantly messy home (and the clean laundry version of Kilamanjaro) but she is so active through hobbies, parenting, church and volunteering that it's obvious her priority is people, and that's awesome!
My room is pretty dusty but I swear I'll get around to it...when I'm not doing something else ;)

Tina Bradley said...

I love the inspiring quotes you've included in this post! Leonie has always been a fave of mine, too. As of late, I find myself prioritizing on a day-to-day basis. Whatever seems (to me) to be the day's priority--that's what it is! It's been a very organic--and freeing way to live. :)

Magic Love Crow said...

I love the last poem! I have to say, this year, I wasn't spending as much time weeding and the grass looked just as good ;o)

Mindy said...

Um, yeah, a person would be hard bent to get me to change this part of me. If my house is a mess, my mind is a mess. And that's all there is to it. I will say, though, that I've learned to ignore certain rooms, so I can pile an ungodly amount of laundry in the utility room and pretend it doesn't exist. But if the living spaces are a disaster, I'm angry and slamming things around.
And, yes, I'm the judger. I will be the one to walk into your messy, dirty house, smile, then go tell everyone I know what a slob you are. Sad, but true.